washington state or alaska...?

i do think i'm ready to move & i have a few places in mind: washington state or alaska or maybe even maine. somewhere to feel accepted in my love of the winter & cool spring & summer. to all of you heat lovers, i dedicate this upcoming super hot summer (according to farmer's almanac). to all of those who live in the south (united states south): how do you possibly stay alive?! it's already hot here in westerville, ohio. creeping too close to 90 degrees for my tastes.

and then a neighbor girl down the street interested my girls in the neighborhood swim team.

do you hear me *not* cheering for this sport? well, that's because i have some intense irish & german ancestry that makes my body shrink from sun. seriously, i wrap myself in light clothing over a thick coating of 80 spf then shade the rest of me with trees, an umbrella or the largest hat this side of the country. and so sometimes when i don't do all the aforementioned procedures i will look like a lobster for the next 6 days.

i mean, adeline got a sunburn in just an hour at swim practice, which starts at 8:30 a.m. ... in case you need more reason to feel sympathy for me. i know, i know, shut the hell up, already!  obviously, adeline is blessed with my skin tone problems. *sigh* 

but really, i'm just not a pool person. i don't swim well, i get headaches from all that sunniness & happy screams and constant smell of bleach. however! it's one of the very few sports adeline can play because of her enlarged vestibular aqueduct. so, there i am at the neighborhood pool every morning with my two girls on a swim team. and plus, millie, in all her five year old wonders, decided last minute to also join the swim team--the kid who WILL NOT put her head under water. i have no idea how this is going to work (backstroke?).

***

but here are the things on my mind while wes is getting groceries (yes!!) and the girls are at a friend's frozen-themed birthday party at an ice skating rink (millie's version of heaven, i'm sure of it)...

• 15 year class reunion this month. to go or not to go? i was only part of this class for 5 years, one of which i instead took college courses. plus, it's father's day weekend. and, well, i just don't feel comfortable going. if you now think me a schmuck, here's the reason...i lived the 3 worst years of my life (abusive high school relationship) then i have no desire to reconnect with those memories in any way. even driving down certain roads brings back horrible memories & PTSD. seriously no fun.then again, most everyone in my high school class were pretty great. gah, the decisions!
• how a child's sport can take over 7 weeks of my calendar. i never wanted to be a parent tied to their kid's sports schedules. never. maybe because i grew up a coach's kid?? i dunno. where is freud when i need him?
• why can't we get siding in the yellow color i want. damnitall.
• how i hope the neighbors katty-corner from us get new neighbors beside them who like weeds & veggies in their front yard...all because i've heard from the neighborhood gossip trail that they do not like my side yard being changed into the french garden, complete with a tree stump walkway & creeping thyme. & they just don't like it, from the sounds of it they & another neighbor find it disgraceful. what? i've been ruminating over this for weeks now & i really think i need to approach these neighbors to talk it out with them because the more i let it go, the angrier i become. which is good for no one, right?
• aging gracefully. loving where my family is & who we are. 
• retirement. how will i live life when i get to that stage. my mother in law is now retiring from teaching, we just gave a total SURPRISE party for her saturday. awesome stuff, giving a surprise party to the socialite & party planner!
• to make up a cleaning schedule or not. to do a chore chart & reward chart for the kids or not.
• i do believe adeline's fish (named allison) is one of those goldfish that will live years & years. it continued to live for 3 days without being fed! whoops.
• how much i do really like my other neighbors. especially the ones who don't bitch about my yard to other neighbors. right?
• daggit i want backyard chickens.
• will amelia be totally disappointed if she doesn't make the swim team? i mean, it's her decision not to put her head under water, true? i thought we'd know by last friday if she made it or not...we must investigate this matter further before 8 a.m. tomorrow.

these are life's big questions, right? well, some of them, maybe, but in general...my worries of whether to work or not are put aside for the summer & i'm just enjoying the decision to procrastinate that major life decision. cheers! to that...