a few years ago, my in laws asked if they could buy the girls a sandbox. we said no thank you...because it's so messy & such. but every time we go somewhere with a sandbox, the girls will play for hours. HOURS, uninterrupted.
then there was also the story from my mother in law to go along with my husband's childhood sandbox days: how before coming in the house they would need to strip down to their birthday suits & she would spray them off with the hose. i would tease my husband, as would his childhood friend. i didn't think it was cruel or anything, just a humorous picture in my mind, right? (& now a humorous picture in your mind...ha!)
i began to think about how wonderful those uninterrupted moments would be...making dinner without the constant "can you help me do x, y, z, x, x, x, x", right? how nice. then we have this space under their swing set that is just filled with mulch. it had a few toys in it but was never played with, really. wes & i went back & forth about the whole sandbox situation & now with the girls coming inside totally filthy dirty from the dirt pile we've given them to play in & plant flowers in...well, a sandbox just didn't seem so different.
so on sunday, wes & i decided it was time to do the sandbox. we told the girls they were getting early birthday presents & once we told them what it was--they were both jumping with joy. they got dressed so quickly, it was like a fairy godmother had bippiti boppidi booped them out of their pj's & into their car seats. they came along with me to toys r us, we found a sandbox, some sand toys & wes went elsewhere to buy sand (much cheaper that way).
they played for hours on sunday. thankfully, the sandbox is shaded under a swingset, which is shaded under a tree so the 90+ heat & sun doesn't get to them as quickly. & the next day, they played for more uninterrupted hours. & after i found sand in their bathroom upstairs sunday evening, i decided to try something a bit old school the next day...
...before coming inside from the sandbox, they are to strip down to their birthday suits & get hosed off. (thanks for the idea, sue!)
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so i get these links for this site, mamapedia. & it usually gives me something funny or interesting or thoughtful to mull over for the day. here's today's post from tara r. wood (why must some use their middle initial?)...she's ragging on moms who vent about their kids obnoxious behavior. i understand that their needs to be a time to build up your children, to not discuss every problem with your friends--especially in front of the kids. but come on!
the bible verse she talks about, romans 12:10 (be devoted to one another in brotherly love. honor one another above yourselves)...sure, i get it, don't tear your kids down. understand that they come before you. but the bible also talks about being in community with others & often for moms this means being in community with other moms. & in healthy communities support is given, people will share the good & the bad. right?
because wes & i are going through some trying times with both of our girls, each with her own set of concerns. it's not something i'm putting out there for all blog readers to know. but i have chatted about it with some friends because it's necessary. i have prayed about it & right after i was fervently praying about it, a close friend suddenly popped her head out of a doorway in church. she let me cry on her shoulder, she let me vent. you can not tell me that wasn't god putting my friend right there for me to talk to.
so anyway, i'm just wondering what anyone thinks about tara r. woods' post & such...
Venting is ok. Horror stories between friends are ok. I can see her point if it a parent is always complaining, but there is humor in some of the crazy things that happen AND there is comfort in discussing it with friends. I see avoiding the cyber rants, but so many people (me included) look at a blog as a place to put their thoughts and not a document that zillions of people read. I worry more about shining up reality (which is sometimes a lie - I just omit that stuff) than I worry about venting. I think Tara went a bit over the top, ok, a lot over the top. Just my take, but if you can't vent to your friends (and get advice) then who can you talk to? Should we teach our kids that you can't talk about negative stuff and that should be kept a secret, festering inside? She has me all worked up. I say, simply, everyone needs to talk to someone sometime and with technology how it is today, that talking might be online. That said, I don't think it is very nice to tweet that "my kid is acting like a little s%h(t".
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