day off

days off don't come very often to a parent, right? i mean, a true day off. no kids, no work. but today is one of those glorious days for me. i get to choose what to do! so why the hell did i schedule an appointment with dr im today? (even worse, my annual exam. i haven't had one for nearly 3 years...) plus i am making a list of things to ask dr im about. you know, WHY DO I FEEL LIKE THIS?! 

so yea, the past few weeks--or maybe months--haven't been the best.stress levels are super high for various reasons (hhmm, money, poor health, toddler who loves to empty containers of baby powder, etc) & i'm growing my hair out (more from lack of money to keep short hair trimmed every 5 weeks than a desire to have long, lustrous hair). & the political ads & constant discussion everywhere about the republicans taking over. just make it stop!

but i do have to admit one thing that is ripping me up: i didn't vote on tuesday. for a few reasons, i mean, i *have* good excuses!

1. i had 3 kids in my care that day with only two car seats.
2. migraine, muscle & joint pain most of the day.
3. exhausted by 6 p.m...if i had gone to vote then, i don't think i actually would've made it to my voting station. someone would've found me walking aimlessly around the town, mumbling something about "why does everything still smell like baby powder?"
4. i'm not quite sure there is much of a difference between most democrats & republicans at this point. i didn't see a candidate that i felt was truly understanding of the stuff i'm concerned about (war, economy, capitalism gone too far, keeping programs & money aside for those in need). about the last one: where would adeline & my family be without aid from the government? if her free special ed preschool  funding is taken away we would be forced to go into the private sector, again. & we'd be spending obscene amounts of money on her speech therapy, occupational therapy--then we'd also be paying for preschool, right?! so that's our situation. just imagine if that need wasn't a some sort of therapy, but food. or shelter. it just doesn't seem right that government spending in these sorts of programs will be cut while we spend millions/billions helping other countries. i'm all for giving aid & helping to stabilize civil wars & such...but there are so many people in need here, in the united states.

anyway, that's all i have time for--off to the shower. one without a child standing outside the shower door screaming & crying & a preschooler knocking on the door asking for a snack. yea!